Here at the sports desk located somewhere below decks of the Good Pirate Ship RedState, we’ve gathered our notes from the extended weekend that was in the NFL playoffs and have prepared comments regarding the four upcoming matchups.

This has been done despite Billy Buccaneer’s lack of participation, as he’s been preoccupied with making sure no one touches the portrait he’s lovingly hung in the galley. Questions have been raised as to why the name beneath the painting, believed to be Dorian Gray, has been scratched out and replaced by Tom Brady. We’ll work on that later.

Before looking ahead, some musings on the first round. Four of the six games were so lopsided there were times one could be excused for thinking the networks were reshowing this year’s Cotton and Orange Bowls. The most surprising blowout was Buffalo’s stampeding of New England; while it did not surprise that the Bills came out on top, Josh Allen and company’s total domination was a fearsome thing to behold. Bills Mafia is smiling in-between breaking tables, a pregame ritual amply testifying to the desultory effects lengthy, bitterly cold winters have on even the keenest minds.